Monthly Archives: November 2011

Tree Priority

There was little fanfare in sawing our Christmas tree down this year.  In fact, it was over before my daughter could complain the third time about the tree being too small.

It’s just that there was this sudden urgency—uh, mental urgency–to get a tree, if only to see the color of our carpet again.

With excessive help from two kids, the Christmas totes had spilled their guts over the weekend. Breakable Nativity people cavorted with reindeer and snowmen around a pile of mostly dead Thanksgiving gourds. And, in a half hour of quality alone time, my son had found the ends of eight strands of last year’s tree lights and yanked them far enough from the clump to reach six different outlets.

It was when my voice spoke in an unknown octave that I realized I just needed to be able to walk across the living room without flailing and grabbing a child on my way down.

Hence the tree.  In November.  And, well, not a day later.

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When ‘M’ Ain’t for Mommy

From his end of the couch my son spoke excitedly. “Hey, dad!” he said.

My husband looked up from his book.

“You know what starts with ‘muh’?”

My husband could think of a few things.  But he waited.

My son let the ‘m’ roll off his lips again.  ”Muh…Mmmy weanus keeps going up and down.”

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Kindred Spirits

We hadn’t expected our twelve year old German shepherd to creak up the stairway and flop in a half moon outside our bedroom door.  He relegated stairs to emergencies now.

And yet he came.  And waited.  And hovered like background music in the hallway.

Which was when we wondered if he didn’t sense something.

Like our fevered son huddled under blankets and wet wash cloths and crying sharply in his sleep.

We propped our door open with a sock and watched as our dog lay guard, like a sentinel, shifting only his eyes to see the small boy whose noise he no longer heard.

As we carried our son downstairs, our dog pushed himself up with tired hips and hobbled after us…I mean…

after him.

 

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Grace for Thanksgiving

Without meaning to, we enjoyed our first vegetarian Thanksgiving.  The turkey, the one my sister pulled from the oven an hour earlier, the one with the broken thermometer under its wing that read 180 degrees sat mostly brown on the counter.  Which was when she and I shrugged and said, “uh, I don’t think we should eat that,” and shoved ol’ Tom back in the oven.  We’d have him for dessert.

Our families circled in the kitchen and uttered our gratitude one-at-a-time.  Only I could have listened longer to hear the whole of my son’s thanks.  He started with closets and gardens and the pants he was wearing.  At which time he remembered Jesus and the sun, and…then we cut him off.  It was someone else’s turn.

My sister’s in-laws had also joined us.  As did her father-in-law’s sister.  And her father-in-law’s sister’s dog, Oreo–an overweight Chihuahua—who would, um, eat from my sister’s father in-law’s sister’s lap at the table and then release his bowels on the carpet at the sound of the smoke alarm.

Only the latter may never have happened had the power not gone out at 5:33 p.m.  Or had we not lit every tea light my sister owned.  And then accidentally blown some out…

Causing a subtle stream of smoke to near the ceiling and signal the smoke alarm.

At which time it chirped…

Causing Oreo to yip his way to hyperventilation and then lose his dinner…

On my sister’s white carpet and down the hall.

Only none of us could see so accurately.  Except with a tea light held to the ground or the seven pound prehistoric flashlight extracted from the trunk of someone’s car.

Which was when we slumped on the couch and laughed harder than we would’ve with a bunch of lights.

We had so many things to be thankful for—our health, our homes, our kids, our finally-cooked turkey, a black dog in its cage.  At  9:19, we even had electricity.

God is good.

Forever. Always. And even in the thick of things.

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No Child Left Behind

Sometimes…even with just two kids we forget one somewhere.

Like at preschool.

For twenty minutes until the teacher calls and asks if we’re coming.

Only…we’re not.  Because we can’t.

At which time we tie up each other’s phone lines with desperate voice mail wondering, “how could this be?”

“I thought you were…” we stammer.

But it doesn’t matter.

Our preschool teacher laughs a non-laugh when we call back.  Surely she’s put out, but she’s kind enough not to say so.  What does concern her, though, is the $135 our son brought to school.

She hears the air leave my lungs and says it again. “A hundred and thirty-five bucks.  To preschool.”

She thought I should know.

And she’s right.

It is a sweet reunion with my little boy and his backpack.

And the money–well, it’s nice to see again, too–even if it had to be pulled limp and sweaty from the inside of my son’s rain boot.

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Monkey Leather

There was  no confusion about whether or not my son wanted his apple fruit strip.

Innately, he tore the green wrapper open with his teeth.  And then gave the thing a big sniff.

This was the good stuff.

Whatever it was.

As my son slowed to savor the last of his strip, he studied the animated animal on the packaging.  ”Is…is this made of monkey?” he asked.

Not that it would’ve mattered.

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Where the Grass is Green Again

My son announced with certainty this morning that he had just grown his first chest hair.  He could feel it, he said.

Only at the same time I squinted and didn’t see anything resembling a future hair, my son pointed to the open blinds and beamed, “It’s snowing!”

And I suppose it was.

If barely counts.

I watched from the window as both kids tested the half inch of snow in their mouths.  I noted their optimism in scoring more white snow despite our large dog trotting the perimeter with his leg raised.  I waved from the back door as they knelt together to harvest our first snow crop for their snowman’s bottom.  Which, looking around, seemed all he might have.

But there–two hours from the moment they clogged out of the kitchen with only their faces showing–stood their snowman.  With three parts.  And a piece of carrot from yesterday’s lunch hovering awfully close its right eye.

I have only to glance at the snow pants dripping in the laundry room and at this fading fellow in the grass to remember what joy the snow can bring. If not for me…for them.

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Four Seconds of Sunshine

Without warning,  the kid who had ketchup for dinner and a side of grill cheese walked toward me in the kitchen with arms spread like an albatross and hugged my hips.

He didn’t pause to evaluate my pony tail or make mention that I wore this sweatshirt yesterday and possibly the day before.  He didn’t even ask for hot chocolate.

He just clung to my waist.  And said, “I love you so much, mommy.”

And…

and I believed him.

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Danger ‘Afoot’

My arm was hardly inside our bedroom groping for the light switch when I sprung back into the hallway.  Something wasn’t right.  I could hear my husband’s voice tucking our kids in across the hall.  Which meant that he hadn’t grabbed my arm.  (Insert pounding heart) So who had?

I tried again, inching my forearm to the light switch and pressing up against the wall.  Only there it was again, the sensation that I’d pushed against someone.

I smacked the switch.

Nobody.

Not behind the door.  Not chillin’in our closet.

Nobody…anywhere.

Which was when I patted my sweat-shirted  sleeve and felt the soft boing of something inside.

Something…like an orange felt shoe stuffed with cotton polyfiber.  The shoe that was no longer attached to our stairway scarecrow but dangling pathetically from my sleeve.

I, uh, have no explanation.

 

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Spench

I’ve never known French.

Which didn’t stop me from claiming that I did.  When I was ten.

I murmured a few slurpy syllables in front of my younger sister.  ”French,” I said.

Her eyes expanded.  I murmured some more, and added hand motions, like I was offering her something to eat.

“Do you really know French?” she asked.  ”Ooh-wibby-wah-we wah,” I answered.

She ran to ask mom.  At which time I jogged quickly after her and confessed to not being entirely fluent.

Last night as our son sat at the dinner table, he declared what we did not know he knew.  ”I know how to say ‘apples’ in Spanish,” he said.

“Really?” I asked.

“Yep,” he said.  ”It’s ‘ooloss’.

“Ahh,” I said. “I thought ‘apples in Spanish was ‘manzanas’.

My son shook his head. “Nope. It’s ‘ooloss’.  I learned it in preschool.”

Just a moment ago my son delivered another surprise.  ”I know how to spell ‘flower’ in Spanish,” he said.

I waited.

“It’s ‘bacon.’

Ahem…Of course it is.

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