The attitude that followed my son home from preschool and then let loose in grumpy words and unapologetic actions isn’t one we endorse. We never will.
It’s just that some time ago we decided to dig to the bottom and find out where things really started. Like with the cupcake from preschool. And the red jello. And the marshmallows.
Things with a bunch of sugar.
And all given with good intention. By a parent who meant well. Who wanted to please. Who loves her kid.
But who had little understanding. I guess.
Only I get it. Or I recognize the belief or the goodness in people that says…
Love equals candy. First prize wins a chocolate bar. You’ve been awesome; let’s go out for ice cream.
We just do things differently–or we try…because our equation looks different: My kid plus sugar equals a naughty boy.
Which was why I leaned over the kitchen counter and asked my son, the one avoiding eye contact and hunching his shoulders at the table, “what was your snack at preschool today?”
He smiled. We both did. He’d heard this question before.
“I didn’t have fancy stuff, mom,” he said. “Like doughnuts that aren’t good for me.”
“I just had some buhnilla cookies.”
We both smiled again.